Havent update this post for years... Now i am back di. Hahaha......... assignment, report, everything new. Well i didn't feel much pressure as i feel previously, and everything still going ok yet..... But duno la. C later........

I start to miss my friends at BM, all hae go to local uni di. To be honest i dunno hw much i struggle to make a decision weather to stay at local or utar. And nw, i am typing at Utar computer lab. Lots of things havent sloved yet. I still havent get a printer for printing. I want to use it for long term, and still, i didn't get a good access on the utar website. My account maybe got problem, causing me cant download up-to-date notes, and need to borrow from friends. But sometimes they need it, so i can only starring on the slide during the lecture. The campus here quite small, And i won't take me long to walk from a corner to another corner. Hehehe......... Well everything still fine here, and i feel comfortable yet, except getting those stupid lecture notes......... Maybe i am staying at right place for my further study.

Eating at here is expensive, and i thin a lot. But the food at here still ok, and i easily adopted to the environment here...... Near LRT, near food court, near bus stop. I can do almost everything.
But still, My net still not good enough to access the msn messanger, and become my real problem in the social chatting...........And net here not so good, So i can only online here.

ENJOY AND ENJOY!!!!

These 2 days..... I stay at home and doing NOTTING!! Yay~~~~~~ Now i feel like i am having a nice holiday break~~~~~~ Really start feel enjoy. Now, erase those problem rotating on my mind, get a spoonful of ice cream put into my cup, and eat it while enjoy watching the tv show that i like it the most, then i go upstairs and start read my favourites books. When tired, I go to sleep~~~~~ till dinner, and then online till late late, and wake up in other day~~~~~~~~~ hehehe........

UTAR and everything bout it. Zzzzzz........

One more week left before my depart to kl. Now what i need to do left...?

Ah yes........ I go search the google earth and see where it located. Well apparently to me, it looked quite small compare to ktar.........

Well on the right side of the silver building, it is UTAR building. And on the left is KTAR building......I just confused... Did they just share the building? Or the KTAR really that big....??( Or is UTAR really tat small....??)

Ahem.... that's nt the point.... Nw i should preparing the things like.... Who am i going with? My family or my friend? Hw long will stay with my friend? What things should i take? and etc etc.... Even my parents start to compare my mechatronic course with mechanical, and Monash with Utar. Really sick of keep explaining to them~~~~~~ Now i really miss my holiday~~~~ aiz......

ok ok stop reminding my holiday again!!!! Now the future is going and going~~~~~ 人生有多少个十年？？If i dont know hw to appreciate it, I will sorry for myself. At least I tell myself, This long break changed me a lot. I learn from it. And it have become my stepping stone to grow up!! So stop flashback to it!! hahahaha.........(Going Kelantan 5 times a month is , to my friends, is nuts.... But to me, amen!!) hahaha..........

Ohya, i will looking forward to meet some of my friends there. hahaha..........

My car and Myself......

This is a True story

about my car

It accompany me since i was standard 5

that time it was my mum who drove it.

But that's another story...

I seldom feel this car existance

Till at 11th June 2007

I get my first P lisence

So my dad allow me to drive it

and tell me that from that day onward

I drive that car to school EVERY DAY

Well i didn't dare to look at the wheel.

I felt a big responsibility hanging on my shoulder.

And all the story was started

When i first step on the padel...

So I may ask

What is so special about this car?

Why i need to state it.

I tell you

Ever since i start driving,

never a day i stop from driving

I almost driving everyday for 2 years di.......

I was given lots of responsibility

going to lots of place

Because of this car

my social circle grew bigger drastically

I drive

From Bukit Mertajam

To Seberang Jaya

From Butterworth

To Penang

From Nibong Tebal

To Kepala Batas

From enjoying driving from the start

To hate driving in the end...

However it is an influencial experience

because i almost spend at least 2 hours per day

driving around Bukit Mertajam.

It is an dilemma

I like this experience eventually

Because i wont get this chance to drive that much after next week anymore......

When i remind about my car

I remind about my f6 life

To be honest i really miss f6 life.....

Even though i really hate it

It keeps reminds me

how desperate that time i want to escape that life

Everyday go to school like go to hell

Not much people will understand how hard and desperate i past these hard moments.....

I even started to consider shifting my f6 to foundation at mmu.

But i stay eventually , and give me the greatest suffer of all time...

And ever since that time

I never believe in fairy tales

I does not deserve to have one, not at all.

Almost along my school life at f6

I am not happy......

But also give me the hardest experience that i ever forget!!

These 2 years is just like a dream

just like yesterday

I think no one of my friend will dream of f6

like me EVERYDAY

In my memory

f6 like yesterday, and it will never faded.

And my car is helping me remembering my f6 every moment......

Climbing Hill

Today I feel sampat, coz I wake up early and pull my friends to go climb a hill here. And we all still want to get more sleep.......

Well you can see how tired am i from my face. Really it takes me forever for me to hike to the top. And when i thought a nice and beautiful scene awaits me. Only then I realised that i am reaching the gate of a celcom satelite tower!!! SO DISSAPOINTING!!!

But anyway i still manage to use the remaining energy left to take some pic... And these 2 are my friends who follow me to reach such proud achievement. Hehe...... See hw excited am i?? Hehe......

And here's how i share my excitement with tom

And then the following day, I spend my time lying on my bed, suffering back ache and leg ache and pigu ache........ And suffer the same pain for the rest of the days.....

A wierd and hard day

Ok today i encounter lots of things that i can't even imgine that it will happen on me. And here is what it is..

1. Today I can't start my car engine. Dunno why. Maybe is the car battery is almost finish, or the petrol which i fueled has bubbles inside the engine starting kit. Just then the alarm suddenly turn on by itself!! I just like omg! And i want to close it but fail. And the irritating sound keep on and on, and disturbing the neighbourhood! I feel so like want to find a hole and put my head inside it! But then the alarm will stop. I thought is over. Just then, when i open the door, the alarm sound up again!! and wait for one minute for it to shut up by itself. And what make things more desperate, I want to have lunch outside! And i didn't eat my breakfast! So with no choice, i walk out and go find the nearest retaurant. And walk under the big sun is susah my skin!! (T.T)
2. Today morning when i woke up, suddenly i saw a bird fly into my room!! I just shock till wake up. Flying in a small room, itseems like flying in a high speed. And i feel that it is impossible to fly into my rom because the upstair is like sealed. There is no holes for it to fly in! I try to get it away but fail. So i just go downstairs and prepare a long plastic stick, try to make some noice to scare it away. But then, i get a call from my friends. And after finish the call, i back to buisness. And thank God that the bird is dissapear di. But sad that it leave a shit as a gift for me. Me really "haiz".......
3. My mum is going for a surgery. So i was force to redraw myself from the trip to kl for 2 weeks. And she will need to stay at hospital start from wednesday. And I will then in charge of the duty at home. Really so sudden! And add more loneliness at my home(T.T)
4. During afternoon, i get a phone call from Hong Kong, saying that i get 2nd prize for getting the lottery. Teorically i no need to believe, but in my heart, i still have the desire to believe it! I feel that it is not right! And like i am greedy and eventually i will get tricked. I must turn to the Lord. And must believe that money can't drop from the sky by itself!!

Ok!!! Back to buisness~~~!!! Like thinking that today incidents is jokes to me ok di!!!! Wahahahahaha..........

Mixed feel about life

Lately I feel like want to share lots of things on my mind. I don't know why i have such wierd feeling. Like I have something that has been hidden in my heart for years. Whenever i want to speak it out, I will have the feel that want me to remain silence. because i know that maybe nobody will understand me. Even myself also can't translate what i was thinking on my mind. Within myself there was hidden a depression. That depression make me feel that my life is still not complete. Whenever i feel free, a sense of vanity will be felt. And what make it worse is that i does not know what my heart really want.

Although it sounds wierd, but sometimes i will feel like this, like:" Ai... Today i can't get the things i want, look how misery of me......" But sometimes i will start to enjoy such self-pitiness. And feel like want to make the world feel that i am a pity guy. A wierd human sense though..... Maybe that's how the " negative feel" came from.......

But it is really an unfair assumption to think myself like that. There are many more people who are living in a harder circumstance than me right now. It is really unfair to label myself " pity"!! Maybe i just struggle to find another channel to express my unhappiness. That doesn't mean that i am negative minded. If think like that, I can realise that i am not an unhappy person, I am just a person who want to express my problem to others. That's all.

" You Think, Therefore you are." That's a word which i learnt from my friends. And lately i study the book " Law of Attraction". I even more agreed with such assumption. And believe it or not, there IS a law of attraction which surrounds us. Everytime our mind will exert one frequence once a time. Whenever we are feel depress, we only exert negative frequency, which will eventuall absorb negative things into our energy field. So we just to need to change the channel to positive frequence, we will experience the different results.

Our mind is just like a radio. Our antenna will only absorb frequencies which we are thinking on our mind. Weather is positive or negative. Well to me. It is hard to always think positive. So to me, let's just be ourselves and live with a happy mind. And if we encounter the problems, the law can be carried out and be applied. And we think positive is not a job which is telling lie to ourself, (If we think like that we only will exert more negative frequency..) It is just like yoga, which help us cleanse our mind and be ourself again....... Wait what was i babbling about...?? Got problem go sleep la. Get a moment of eye close.. Zzzzzzz...........

The decision is final. Maybe......

Jimmy said to me this afternoon, that the application outcome for Nanyang Technological university has released. I was full with hope and suprise, that the day of decision has come. So with full hope i go to online and check the status. And the statement really bother me then....

" Your application is still under consideration, The application result will be notified as late as July 2009"

Say WHAT???? Jimmy already get the result already and i still haven't know yet?? That means... I now is competiting with other university entries holders within the region di like Vietnam, Thailand, Indonesia........We Malaysia already have 4 different test holder like UEC, A-Level, STPM,Australian Matriculation pun ada! I just so like "omg!!" Is it that my chance is over? Or i am in the secondary consideration list.....??

Even i manage to enter, will i manage to survive? Or will i end up suicide there? (Choi!! Touch WOOD!!.........)For those reason, willing or not, i may go to study at utar........ My friend give me a thumb down for my decision, say that :"U deserved better university", "U can take the HELP or MMU, "U should wait for the local university!! Or u study form 6 for what..??".....etc The wave of rejection is huge, and i so like " Man!! Money oso give liao, what to do....??" Till KJ gt confort me, gt stand up for my decision. (Thanks for that. Hehe.......) I think my plan is like that For May and June then, and here's what on my mind......

First 2 weeks of May: Go KL training
Last 2 week sof May: Go out and hang out with friends
May 28th: Back to KL for Utar entry registeration
May~July: Study at UTAR while wait for application outcome for both local and Singapore university

That is my plan 1st. It still might change with the trend. See what will happen at May till July........

Busy...? Lazee....?

My friends usualy will ask me a simple question:" So how are you doing lately." And my reply is tat i keep leisuring at home. I couldn't refresh what am i doing for past few weeks. But then, my parents keep nagging me that i does not spending time at home very much, keep go out and come back late. Well the statement is true.... And now.. I try to list some new and crazy things i have experienced which i can remember...

1. There is one night i come back home at 2am midnight because i watch midnight movie with friends.

2. I drive as far as Nibong Tebal and Kepala Batas for 1st time

3. My first car accident ever since i start driving

4. I go to Kelantan 4 times in a month. (And my first driving experience at Kota Bharu.)

5. First time i witness hyperactive children and how they behave

6.There is one time i go out from home at 9am morning and come back home at 11.30pm night. (Realy crazy though..)

7.I witness 3 car accidents in a month (Is it luck or.......??)

8.My first hill hiking at Bukit Tekun ( I never know it located near my house....!!)

9. There is one time i go watch 3 movies in 3 days continuously.... ( Gee what a waste..!)

10.There is a week when i fuel up my car twice a week! ( And i have a big explanation for my dad)

11.There is a week when i only spend my time having dinner with my parents only once in a week.

12. I have passed through USM branches at Kota Bharu, Penang and Nibong Tebal di......

13. I have written 6 English essays in applying scholarships...... ( I get bad temper that time because of that..)

I now start counting the holidays left on my hand. I won't get as much leisuer time as i want to later di... I now start to tresure every moment i have on my hand. Hope that i won't waste it again...